As Koreans marry later, older brides and younger grooms become new normal

A 40-year-old newlywed surnamed Lim in Seongnam, Gyeonggi, tied the knot in March with a man eight years her junior after meeting him at work. In her 20s, she had little interest in marriage and mostly dated older men. But as she entered her mid-30s, she realized many men her age were already married or divorced. Rather than prioritizing a partner's age, she began widening her criteria to find a match.

"Given the circumstances, it naturally broadened my options to include younger men too," Lim said.

As Korea's marriage rate shows signs of a rebound, a growing number of women marrying later in life are helping push unions between older women and younger men to a record share of all first marriages last year. A total of 20.2 percent of first marriages last year involved an older bride, the first time the figure has topped 20 percent since related data collection began, according to figures released by the Ministry of Data and Statistics in March. 

Industry observers say sustained media exposure of older-woman couples has also helped shift public perception. A slew of female celebrities have opted for younger men in marriage over the past five years, including Olympic figure skater Kim Yu-na, actor-singer Jang Na-ra and actor Shin Min-a, and serve as examples of unions that "worked out well," per online posts touting the benefits of this marriage age dynamic. 

Newlywed Lim said she wasn't unaware of the social stigma surrounding marriages where the woman is older. But her husband actively persuaded her when she hesitated, and their temperaments — her more anxious disposition and his more stable one — meshed well.

"Looking at friends who married later, marrying someone the same age or younger has clearly become more common than before," she said. "A marriage where the woman is older doesn't seem strange or awkward at all anymore."

Unlike in the past, when a man's job stability or age were considered key factors in the marriage market, some now point to a growing emphasis on dual-income potential and shared values or lifestyles as another reason for the diversification of marriage patterns.

"In the past, men strongly preferred women at least four years younger, but recent consultations show many are open to women one or two years older if their values and other conditions align well," said Jeon So-ra, an employee at local matchmaking company Duo. "Women, too, increasingly prioritize financial compatibility and overall harmony with a partner over the age gap."

Shin Kwang-yeong, professor emeritus of sociology at Chung-Ang University, said Korea’s traditional marital order is changing. Patriarchal norms have historically favored marriages in which men are older than women, reflecting overlapping age-based and gender-based hierarchies.

"But the rise in marriages where the woman is older shows this traditional marital order is weakening, and boundaries around age in marriage will likely grow more flexible going forward," Shin said.

BY LEE AH-MI, KWAK JOO-YOUNG [lee.jian@joongang.co.kr]